This isn’t the time for tips and anatomy lectures but anal is only going to be as good as the position, speed and amount of lube you use.
Like a roller coaster ride or trying a new exotic dish, anal sex can be daunting. Really fucking terrifying. There’s anxiety. You tense up even though you know that doesn’t help.
And then, when it gets going, you question why the fuck you waited to do it and why you don’t do it more often.
It first happened with a bit of finger play. We each tried out each other’s anuses and that kinda ended there. For some reason, finger play feels more intimate than full on anal. Not my thing.
How does it usually unfold? Well, buckle in, cause the following details are gonna get nasty, and intimate and if we’re lucky, flat-out arousing.
It’s usually the result of watching some porn. No specific kind of porn in particular, just something a little different and out of the ordinary. Enough for you to build up a mass of sexual energy – to get you horny to the point where you feel like you’re bursting, or leaking.
From there, if you’re lucky enough, you start getting it on with your partner. Sometimes it begins with vaginal intercourse and goes to anal (Never go from anal to vaginal without cleaning in between.) It begins crossing my mind when I feel like we’ve hit our threshold – like when I feel he’s in deepest or going the hardest he can go; but I still want more. Then we make the move to anal. It begins with putting A LOT of lube on his cock; from the head, down to the shaft. Then putting some more lube around your anus, get in real deep there, it’s not the time to be shy (go about 2cm deep at this stage).
The position I find most pleasurable and effective is doggy. You on your knees and him behind you. Make sure he knows that the speed and depth is to be controlled by you. Then you start.
First, it’s just the tip. It might hurt like hell if it’s your first time. Play with the tip going in and out until you feel comfortable going deeper. He might forget that you’re meant to be controlling it so just speak up if he’s going too deep too fast.
Then you go deeper, centimetre by centimetre. Take it slow. Painstakingly slow if you must.
Eventually, you’ll get to the full depth and you’ll feel comfortable going harder and faster. At full depth, your G-Spot should be getting stimulated like never before. At this point, you might want to relinquish control to him.
You can switch it up or add to it by playing with your clit while you’re going at it, or adding a toy to whichever hole isn’t being used.
Anal sex can be incredibly pleasurable and can lead to successful and recurring orgasms.
*Remember that your anus doesn’t self-lubricate so don’t be shy to stop halfway to add more lube.
* The above was written from a heterosexual perspective but pronouns are interchangeable and in place of a cock, one might use a dildo or vibrator.
And it will feel like you need to go to the loo, but unless you’ve been eating high fiber food or you’ve been feeling sick, chances are that the feeling is a false alarm.